By: Chris Churchill/Contributor What the hell does an elephant or a mule have to do with either of these parties today? Are elephants dogmatic, rich and selfish? Are mules empathetic, secular, and over-educated? Not that I know of. Where’s Sir David Attenborough when you need him? And of course, the above attributes aren’t all that make up the two parties. I suggest, based on a series of less tangible traits, that we find new mascots. I hereby nominate, to represent the Republicans, the bonobo.  And to represent the Democrats, the chihuahua.  I want to to disclose a little about myself before I go on. I am from Kansas. I am the son, grandson and great-grandson of Protestant fundamentalist preachers. However, my dad, my siblings and I myself are highly educated. Most of us have advanced degrees in fields that are meant to help others. Psychology, sociology, social work, therapy, communication. These types of things. I think one could find reason to believe ...

By Chris Churchill/Contributor Do we even know what the hell we’re saying? Do we care that we do or don’t know? I contend that we don’t know and we don’t care. Most of us were never given the option to understand and agree to any pledges of allegiance or celebration of what being American even means. As children, before we even understand the meaning of the individual words, let alone their combined denoted meaning or, even more complicated, their connotative meanings, they make us swear that we understand and agree. If you unpack the Pledge of Allegiance, it would be as complicated as an iTunes terms of service agreement. You want to play, right? Just say you agree. So as kids, we are forced—yes, we are forced; no child has the critical thinking skills, the power or the authority to disagree—to say the “The Pledge Of Allegiance.” It goes like this (sing along if you know the words): “I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic fo...